Randomness in the Life of a Fool

awww, Thanks! ^^ Anyone who tries this has to be insane, cause it's totally stupid and dangerous to the health.

It's 7:12 pm here. In less than half an hour, I'll only have 24 more hours to go. and I really haven't done much today. I took a nice shower, where my skin sometimes felt slimy. Maybe it was the liquid soap after all... But it was nice to have a proper amount of shampoo and conditioner. I think at one point I started talking to myself, as if playing out a story. Like I was living one of my dreams. And it made NO sense. lol

after my shower, I took the time to empty two practically full tubes of coloured hair gel into my hair. Oh yeah, I'm going to get a picture and scan it for ppl to see. Once it tries so that I can get into my costume for the night. And wash the stains off my skin. While it would be cool if covering my entire body, blue and purple skin isn't fun. I made it to dinner. yummy... pizza and dirt cake ^^ and apple cider!
Everyone liked my hair.

At my table, a guy was yawning and complaining about how he was still tired even though he got plenty of rest lately. I had to smirk, because nobody has noticed anything different with me. But I told them. And I put a note on my door, cause I really don't want to be disturbed. Part of this IS so that I can work on my essays. And now, here I am! About ten o'clock is 'trick or treating' in our rez. Basically we get dressed up and run around the building for candy. I couldn't buy some decently priced mircowave popcorn from the rez shop, cause they were all sold out. awww, poor me! Popcorn is so easy to eat! and at fifty cents a bag!

oy! I'm dizzy. The world spins in and out of focus. Can't concentrate on looking at one thing. My head hurts. stabbing-pin-chill in my shoulders, and my head is beginning to throb. Time for the pills. and a hair dryer.

~Neko Baka


owwwwwwwwwwwwww! my head hurts!!!! sharp throbbing PAIN!!!

shhhh! I'm listening to pepsi...

1:15 am I'm still awake! yes! owwwwwww... my head... my eyes are considering to declare war on me, but at least my stomache is satisfied this time... oops...spoke too soon... drat! Well, I have a medium gift-bag overflowing with goodies. It's all spread out on my bed, so I don't even DARE to consider lying on it. Oh, and I got four pops (sodas in American). I'm having temperature flashes. Mostly warm. I think last night it was cold. But yeah, I have a pepsi, a coca cola, a sprite and a mello yello. The sprite and mello yello (sort of like mountain dew) are clear soft drinks, so they don't have caffeine in them, since I'm in Canada.

I took pictures of me in my costume. I called myself a random anime person when anyone asked. They still don't know, but I told a don. She looked very worried and asked why I was doing something like this. I told her that it was to write my essays. She understood that. My parents don't know that I'm doing this. They think I'm either running around hyper, or sleeping. oy, I need more pills. Headache coming, and my eyes don't want to stay open. A Jolt cola would be nice right about now...

Yeah, but I'm ignoring the outside world, after running around grabbing candy. I ended up pulling out my silver kimono after all. It sort of matches my PJs, in an art sort of way. At least, I think they do. I got a lot of compliments. But I was nothing compared to this group of four. This one girl, as I take it, she's studying how to do costumes and makeup, and she's really really good. She does fairies and furries... Cuuuuuute! anyways, I concentrated in how much loot I could grab. sugar thief!!!!!! wheeeee!!! oy, tired bit now.

That's it! I'm getting some pop! ohhhh, look! change so that I can do my wash! enie-menie-minie-mo... pepsi... oy, can you tell I just grabbed the four non-diet cans that were left? I dunno... ah, temperature is tolerable. Now I should do something about the music...
oh pills. MAke the world stop spinning!!!!! mahahaha! I'm counting how many yawns I've made during this. So far, only four. hmmm, medication... oh! It's November now!! I must write my strange little observations into something that resembles a story. I will go and write for 24 hours @#%$ per week, starting on thursday nights. heh, people were trying to scare me about stories of people who died of sleep deprivation of 81 hours. riiiiiight...

something else, what was it? hmmmmmmm, I can't remember... oh wait, now I do! Things are moving in the corner of my eyes. That little green start button for Windows XP, it turns orange in the corner of mty eye, and it's right next to messenger, so I think that someone is trying to talk to me, when it's just nothing. I"m making stupid typing mistakes. But I'm correcting them so that u don't notice them as much. yeah, I automatically go back and edit my work. CAn't go on if it's not right. arrrggggg! my EYES!!! The strain!!! I painted my face with watercolours. It's fun! The best!

oh, essays...

I was going to say something else, but I forgot. Oh yes, my HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot any sensation from my scalp. My hair is a mass of triggy strands, stiff and oily...

AH!! damn pills WORK! I took a full dosage. I'm not on my anti-anxiety pills... oh @#%$...

Well, here goes nothing. BRING IT ON BRAIN!!! oy...

It's 3:57 am. I don't think that pop is as good as coffee. ummm, I'm not sure, at least I don't feel like my insides are being burned in my own stomache acid. And I have a feeling that there's others in the building that are still awake. Come on, it is a Friday night/ Saturday Morning. Reading is becoming a bit of a problem. Things won't stay in focus. It's sheer determination that I'm starting on NaNoWriMo. and I'm sooooo late!!! oh well, I'll just get started and use big text so I can see better. It does go by word count.

I'm still trying to figure out when I stopped being a fishhead and became a Grasshopper. Any thoughts anyone?

Gee, it's so lonely here! ^^ no body else is online, that I can see anyways. I realized something, I'm exactly one hour/time zone a head of ezboard.

colours are looking weird. Sounds sometime too. oh, I'm going to try Green Tea. It's healthy.

trying not to write a return letter to my friend overseas cause I really don't think I can string together anything relevent to her. I'm sure she would love to hear that I'm inflicting myself to this. She's sort of manic depressed herself. oh, all of my friends are like this. joy, eh? I've lost the ability to understand my handwriting. or maybe I'm being lazy and am writing too fast. It sort of looks like my brother's handwriting, and that's a language all to itself.

My hair still feels weird. I put a wooden chopstick in it to keep it out of my face while I was painting (on my face, by the way. I'm hoping to get a picture. Does anyone want to see?) Anyways, afterwards, I ran my hand 'through'my hair, temporarily forgetting the chopstick, and thought it was part of my hair.

Yep, there's others awake in the building. Two just walked past my door. I finally remembered how to keep the room from overheating, opening the door and putting in a doorstop (right now, in my case, a brick) so that there's some air movement. I used to open the windows, but that's killer on the allergies. oh, and when I pulled the chopstick out of my hair, it was covered with blue. I'm wondering whether I'll take a long enough shower sometime to wash all of the gel out. I wonder whether my hair might be dyed for a while.

hey! Where'd that bandana go to? It was right here a minute ago!! at least, I think it was a minute ago... but still! Where'd it go??! I can't find it! wahh!! I need it!
I need it to help find my face so people don't see what I"ve painted on it until everyone else wakes up!!
oh wait... there it is... right by my foot... Stop Falling OuT of My HAnd, you Stupid bandana!! oy!

hmmm, I should really wash this paint off my hands. It's just the right colour of dried blood. I might start thinking that it is dried blood! not that I'd freak, or anything, cause there's reasons for why I wear bandaids, even the ones on my face! (I painted them too ^^)

It looks like ppl are pretty much gone to bed here. slightly feverous. I want to paint!!!!! write! Paint!! WRITE!!

...whatever...


~Neko Baka

oy... I'm starting to drool again... and I care? SHUT UP!!
talking to myself again...

words blurring... there goes my plan to read...

unlucky 13, eh? Well, it figures. 7:30 am was the two thirds marker or something like that. Math sure isn't my strength, and definitely not now. All I'm immediately sure of right now is that I'm within twelve hours of reaching my goal, that stiff hair gel can be hazardous to your hair and is hell to get out (well, the entire tubes at once, anyways), And. I'm. In. PAIN!!!! OH GOD AM I IN PAIN!!!!! I'd liken it to that time of the month, but I'm not sure guys really understand that torture.

Pin-stabbing chills are running all over me; there are times where my eyes are blacking out; My wrist is a little sore; my head feels so heavy and it's such an effort. I feel like I'm going to throw up, so I"m not going down for breakfast, which would only be cold ceral and I don't feel like talking anyways. My eyes burn from the strain of trying to read. And there's a whole lot of other shit that I don't know how to explain, because it just HURTS. colours are swirling. The room won't stay still. Sound... sometimes I can recognise it, but other it's just noise. my neck aches. my back aches. Every slightlest movement sends pain rippling threw me. I'm just hoping that I'm not dying from Ritalin and/or Ibuprofen overdose.

Pills, I've taken Ibuprofen. urg, it's taking me so slow to type. While I'm waiting for painkillers to kick in and save me, I'll update what I"ve been doing. First, I painted my face with watercolours. I was going to take a picture of the finished product and show it on a site somewhere, but unforturatle watercolour can be scratched off skin and it didn't last the night. I did some NaNoWriMo registering, and did some writing, and some research for the writing. Then I realized how incredibly unfun my hair is by this point, and I try to scrape it from my hair. It doesn't hurt, but it brings hair with it, and the hair is left dry. oy, at least the bandaids are staying on.

I'm hungry
shivering, I"m shivering. I'm cold yet I'm not.
good thing about hair, it's so stiff that it stays in place when tied back.

It'll be my luck if I get the gel out of my hair, and yet my hair is still coloured. hmmm, might actually be interesting.

oi, I spaced out there...

my sense of time is impaired. I could have sworn it was 8 just five minutes ago. or was it eight thirty? hmmm, ability to walk seems to be challenged, as well as sense of balance. I almost fell out of my chair for absolutely no reason at all!! spatial perception is faulty too.

My mom just called, all emotional and she's talking while I'm sitting here trying not to scream from the pain. I've had worst, I'm sure. It's just the sensation/pain of pins that drives me nuts.

Enigma's boring me right now. need...music... oy... the thing that I hate about this is that last night I was fine and it's only now that it seems like payback for having both yesterday and last night relatively okay. Other than the dance where they put on Britney Spears **shudders**

despite the hair gel, I still feel like I'm wearing my baseball cap.
hmmm, impulse control? Didn't have much to begin with, so that's gone to hell in a handbasket. umm, dunno about the whole mood thing. I'm on pills for mood swings and panic attacks. hmmm, I didn't take them last night, but it really shouldn't matter anymore.

I know that sensory is shot. I think that I might be hallucinate, but so far it's only overlaping songs.

ACK!!! I just stopped myself from falling asleep. OKay, I will take some ritalin, just to maintain stimulation. but my brain is mush.

But I WILL complete this.

argg! Aqua's annoying me now. damn!!! (yep, impulse is GONE)

hm, warm clothes. I want warm clothes...
ritalin...

DAMN HAIR!!! I HATE YOU!!! I'm going to cut it all off, and then what will it do??!!!!!!!!!!!


... **blinks** WTF?

i'm scaring myself now...

ick, some hair gel greese still on keyboard

That's really cool Zimoway. It's 12:31 here, so I just have to last the afternoon and supper, then I can curl up in my covers ^^ Right now my bed is covered with candy and discarded clothing that I switch into depending on the temperature I'm feeling and how feverous. For this entire time, my curtains have been closed, and even though the brick in between the big heavy fire-security door that is mine, and the frame, it's considered closed here, so nobody bothers me and I can pretty much wear whatever I want. Especially in a single room. Very nice when I'm doing stunts like this.

All I've done between posts is had one big shower. I got all that icky hair gel out of my hair. it feels soooooooo nice!

My pills kicked in sometime, so now I'm feeling better and am just a little dizzy. In the shower, I nearly fell asleep standing up, so I decided to sit down, where the world didn't shift so much. I caught myself drifting again when I failed to keep my mind occupied. I got disoriented trying to get up, so I had my entire shower sitting on the floor. To keep myself from getting too comfortable, I keep changing positions. some random things that popped into my head was a conversation, and the thought that there was a spider in my brush. The fact that the shower is dimly lighted didn't help. It's so good to have hair actually feel like hair.

oy, head sleepy... that's the only problem with showering during the day; it makes me sleepy. But what's worse is that for the entire time I was in there, I had Avril's Complicated stuck in my head. Can we say annoying? thought so...

so happy me when I came back up to my room and The Tea Party was playing. ^^ yeah, that's all that's happened lately. maybe a little later I'll repaint my face. it's fun! oh, and fanart! when sleeping, I plan to mute my phone...


~Neko Baka

oy, I've been starting at every sudden sound. It's 4:02 pm, so I have three and a half hours left until I collapse into bed with my brain turned to mush. or moonjuice. Whatever.

I'm actually getting somewhere with my essays, which is great. I've been thinking about what this experience has been like, and how it's going to feel to sleep again. Really, I'm almost used to living without sleeping. A little thought crossed my mind to do 24-hour writing sessions for NaNoWriMoon sometime on Thursday, or all day Fridays. Get up exactly at 12 am and go to 12 am. only writing. fun, huh?

It's 4:43 now. I just realized that all I've eaten today is sugar. My end post will be a med log, a yawn count, symptoms and my suggestions for anyone else. This is kind of fun. I like having so much free time. However, the pain is sort of annoying...

anyways, I'm not really doing anything new for the rest of the time. I'm going to finish up the essay outline that's due Monday, maybe write (but I doubt it), and watch Clueless while drawing Kagerou fanart. ^^
~Neko Baka

oh boy, what have I gotten myself into? I've joined National Novel Writing Month, and I got two essays, a presentation, and a midterm all due this month.

Oh yes, and I completed my sleep deprivation experiment of 60 hours, by the way. oY, it was fun...

anyways, I'm off writing. Let's see, when should I work on my essays and stuff? Weekend? Sounds good to me... oh, and times when I got writer's block. And then when I got writer's block on both of those, I can try to figure out the stupid html for amhelaki misadventures, or try to write my other stories that are currently on hold. Yeah, I should finish Demension Hopper...

meh, I'm soooooo BORED!!! And slightly shaken...
I gave a presentation that I spend about half an hour on, and I'm not sure how I did. egga!!! it's bad though, I've been having weird sleeping hours. I don't think that Experiment Wired was too good for me. oiii, now I'm hungry!!

But there's a coffeehouse going on downstairs, and I don't want to interrupt... so I can't make any food!! hmmm, and so all I got left are these sugarless lolipops, the only lolipops I could find **crys** I WANT LOLIPOP!!!!! sugarless sorbee are HORRIBLE!!! ick! ick! ick!! don't like it indeed!!
oh, we had to watch Emma in class yesterday. I didn't like the version that they showed us. I like the one with the big hats.

hmm, I think the coffee house might be over, people are being loud in the hall. anyways, I bought the lolipops to help me feel better. ewwwww! **tearful sniff** and all I wanted was some sugar because I want to stay up tonight, doing small homework things because it doesn't matter if I sleep in tomorrow cause it's Friday and I don't have class, I just have to get those notes from the new note taker because the old one ran away or something.

How's that for a runon sentence? oiii!! HUNGRY!!!!!!!

I slept in too late to go to Art History today. I'm learning not to go to bed at three in the morning. baka baka baka!

Oh yes, Pam-chan , thank you for the wonderful layout!! Ka-wa-iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!

I learned another thing today: how to use a bra to hold stuff. Like money, and keys! and my pocket-knife!!! oy, better not try to get on a plane like that!!! **giggles** image the scene at security. Not to mention the metal in those things ^^ not going to say more. Not going to say more... he heh hee ^^ I have a witches' hat that has metal wiring. I always joke about traveling by plane with it. he hee heh ^^

Let's see, so I'm going basically 48 hours. Not that I'm doing another sleep deprivation. This is loose terms here. Come on! Let's think about this; I'm still recovering from Experiment Wired. Also, my next goal is 72 hours, so why waste my time with 48? sheesh people!

Ja Ja!! I know, what AM I thinking, Sleep deprivation? well, it's crazy, it's dangerous, yes, but I feel that it helps you know your limits. You never know when you might actually have to stay awake for a long time, and it's better to know now in a safe (well, it's university, so relatively safe) environment and not somewhere really really stupid. It's either that or the fact that I've been very complusive and when I saw it on a forum, I couldn't resist.

he heh... where was I? anyways, so I'm basically wasting my time, la la la, and I figure, let's go read online comics! But it seems like no one has updated!! awww!! where is everyone? yeah, I know, November is stressmania for students, but still! A filler?
And what's with manga-ka s and NaNoWriMo? Are they ALL doing this? oyyy!!! hmmm, speaking of which, maybe I should work on mine... like I should be working on my essays...

AND WOULD MY MOTHER STOP CALLING ME!!!!!!

Goodevening/night whatever. Asperger forever!

it started to realy snow last night. before that it was raining really hard. It was cold a miserable. But great inspiration for novels. I have a few ideas now bouncing around my head, waiting for when I can return to NaNoWriMo. I'm somewhere in the 4, 000 wordcount. It's pretty bad, for me.

Anywas, last night in Film Studies, we watched clueless . I have to say that it was entertaining, although I would never go to see it in theatre, or on purpose. I tried to watch it in my room, but it didn't work as well **Shudders** which I suppose is just as well.

We had a quiz in Film Studies too. I think that I did good on it, although I felt that I did good on the others ones too, and I've totally bombed. What stinks is that I keep on forgetting that wrong answers mean minus a half mark. Oi!

then after that, when I got home, and was changing out of my cold, wet clothes (I got drenched walking home, and I had picked up some fries, my poor precious Harvey's fries!), I realised that I had dropped my keys somewhere. Okay, so I learned the hard way not to just drop keys into my bra, but to actually plan on where to put them. I had to walk all the way back to the campus, a half hour walk in normal circumstances, retracing my steps, and looking to see whether they were lying on the ground. I had a hunch that they would be in the lecture theatre, because it's the only place that I went into that had carpeting, and I knew by the scratchy metal that I had them when the lecture started. I moved them around during the lecture, so that's when they would most likely have fallen out. So I finally get to the lecture hall, feeling slightly peeved, cause it had been raining before, and right then the storm was breaking up (so it appeared). I was very thankful for whatever reason it was that the theatre was still open, and yes, lying underneath my seat (I pretty much sit in the same seat every week, with the same two guys, who are basically the only friends I've made, because they like anime and fantasy and writing and sci-fi, etc. not really Otaku's [I'm more otaku than them!! and I don't try to live up to it ^^] , but general fans of sci-fi and fantasy, including anime) were my keys!! So I didn't have to go to my don, scared and worried about losing my keys.

On my way home, I celebrated by buying a frozen dinner to eat, cause I missed supper. and I didn't do anything last night but download Naruto stuff, because of a bad headache from being outside. And then it started to storm again, and I hung around the senior residences (a married couple) for a bit, chatting. They have fantasy novels ^^ I want to go read them! I miss reading for fun! hmm, should curl up one Friday night in the Atrium with a book ^^

I have to finish writing my English essay tonight, because then I have to work on my Film essay. My Mom's all worried, and has been calling me and calling me. But she's not as worried as me, because I didn't tell her about the Art History Midterm today that I've barely studied for, because of the Film Studies Presentation (again, I didn't tell her) and the quiz yesterday (again, I barely studied).
Gee, I really haven't been really dedicated to my schoolwork, I feel. I feel like I must be really smart if I can pull this all off.

and oh yes, I paid my phone bill for $9.10 just a few minutes ago. What would I do without online banking, eh? And I'm writing a letter to my friend in Australia. For some reason, I keep on thinking that I'm spelling Australia wrong. hmm, I also want to write to my friends in Idaho, just cause it'll be fun to have pen pals ^^ I'm going to email them my address ^^

oh yes, I drew a picture that I feel has to be the most accurate self-portrait that I've ever done. I have it coloured in markers on my door, but I scanned it when it was in black and white beforehand, in case I messed up or something. gee, I wish I had photoshop or something, cause then I'd practice colouring with it. I'm so jealous of other webcomics that has nicely coloured pages and cool layouts. Mine stinks! I just was able to figure out how the updating system works, and then something of what I can do with HTML, and then I figured out to resize my pages before saving and uploading them is easier than trying to get them to fit on the web. (hmm, maybe I should go and edit my old pages then... oi, too much work!)

Photoshop would be nice though... just to make the layout at least decent. I'm not really into dressing up artwork. I think that my artwork is half-decent for someone who mainly uses it for expressionism, and for doing plotoutlines. It's not like I'm looking to become a manga-ka, although that would be cool...

Oh! G2gG, my midterm starts soon, and it started to snow last night. Hasn't really let up.


~Zika
~Korina
~Neko Baka

Well, here's something for you: I've accidently started another experiment. Some slight differences, I had intended to sleep tonight, cause I got classes tomorrow. As long as I get there on time and don't fall asleep in class and hand in my essay, I'm good.
The reason why I stayed up all last night was to edit the English essay I started the last time I did sleep deprivation (nice loop, eh?).
unlike last time, I've had about two, maybe three more hours of sleep beforehand (last time I had four **points to last post**). The only change I'm noticing is that I don't feel sick. And I've basically been drinking pepsi all night long.
And the last, and probably the most important:
since it's that wonderful time of the school year that is noted for high stress levels, and I'm trying to write two essays in basically a week. as well as NaNoWriMo, and daily student, my normal ADD/Asperger anxiety is sort of really high.
And I think I've overdosed on Ritalin.

I'm not sure, cause sometimes it seems that I have, but I think that this time I might have just taken too many pills too close together, and thus, I'm a nervous wreck. At least, today I am. Yesterday I was just a little stressed, but now I'm almost obsessed with scratching at my skin, a nervous habit I thought that I had almost trained myself out of. I can't concentrate on my work because there's too many things that I've left undone (like wash, and small things like that) and I'm now suddenly really afraid that I'll forget, almost like everything in the universe depends on it.

Interesting, some random person on yahoo messenger has started chatting with me cause they like my name... a random person...I don't use my real name, baka! **shakes head** never use you're real name, first rule, with net stalkers and all... from what I can tell, male, 15, American, likes cars

I'm jittery. Little noises startle me. I've had to mute my phone and cover it up. I'm hungry, but that's probably because I didn't go down for lunch. Just the thought of social interaction makes me start to panic. I'm trembling. It feels like I'm having trouble breathing, like an asthma attack or something. I can almost feel the way my heart is pumping blood through my body. I feel almost like I'm picking up where I stopped the last time. but I don't feel so sick. My eyes hurt, and I don't suppose trying to wear contacts helped much. colour and senses are a bit messed too. A little dizzy and a tad of the headache I've had all week...

I think... I think that maybe chatting on yahoo is helping. I'm not sure. Maybe the pills are wearing off. if it turns out that it's not, then I'm going to health services. I'm afraid to go there, because I'm not a student of where I'm staying, so maybe they won't treat me, but that's stupid, why would they not? And then my parents will find out **winces** ohh, The LOOK. You can hear it in their voices, that one look of disappointment that says more than ten thousand words. It's worse than anger, cause it's easier to understand and deal with. Disappointment wounds your soul because they thought better of you, and you just destroyed their respect of you, and it'll take a lot more than what you just did to get that back.


**looks at what she just wrote** **blinks** what the-? I just made that up from the top of my head!

oi...

blood stains on my white shirt...

hey there! NaNoWriMo count: 6,846 words. supposed to be at 33, 000 by now. Oh well, I'll just continue to write. It's the jump start that I needed to start the Mages of Amhelaki Trilogy. Am thinking of making it a sage, with Lex's story. maybe that will just be an offshoot, cause it has no real development to the rest of the trilogy.

Sometime early this month, I downloaded Kazaa, and then someone convinced me to try K-Lite, which is so much better! ^^ It's so nice to wake up in the morning and see that new media has been completed. Although the contents are a bit of a risk. Face it, someone could be mean with some of those files!
Am really happy that RIAA can't get me^^ wahahahahaha!

Naruto and Inuyasha cravings are just slightly put to ease with music vids and the promise of episode downloads ^^ ohhh, Fruits basket...kyo... **drools** ^^ meh, I've downloaded some of the 'classic' AMVs that I've seen at anime clubs. Still looking for that rhythm one that's really fun to test out anime identification knowledge. I was proud at one club that I was the only one to id 'You're under arrest', and I've only seen the first episode, and so long ago... I can't remember what language it was in. Eventually, after reading the subtitles so fast and hearing the Japanese, the Japanese voices start speaking in English in my head.

Speaking of English, done my english essay. Am working on my Film Studies right now. It's going better than English, cause of structure. I'd like to thank my brother the logic genius of the family. I'm the creative one, remember? I'm going crazy with icons!! ^^ whee!

oi, should be writing. May have to pull another all nighter, maybe a two dayer again. Hopefully I won't overdose.

Had fun at Health services. Had major nosebleed. Apparently people aren't supposed to loose that much blood. oi, and the clotting! I was coughing the stuff up. eww! I'm kind of used to it though, after about three years of this? oh yeah... but clinic at school was worried, since it was taking so long for the bleeding to stop. And apparently I have unusually thin blood. They want me to come in for blood tests. Later on the phone, Mom informs me not to worry about it, cause it's something that runs in the family. It doesn't make the possibility of going to the hospital because I can't stop bleeding any better.
Two hours, that's how long it took. I got back to class for most of the film. Will and Dave (the guys I sit with) say that I didn't miss much. I hate the smell of blood now. Oi, delayed headache-reaction.

Hmm, Lain and Slayers is Saturday. Next week is Babylon 5 marathon **drools** B5...

Watched the first episode of Read or Die. heh heh, mesa want to watch more!!! ^^ all the books... **drool** **drool** books... heh hehe heh...

hmm, idea for next NaNoWriMo, Sleepless in Amhelaki ^^ the deprivation of Lex. Lex and some friends decide to see how long they can last with sleep deprivation, with some interesting results. First person, cause writing from the viewpoint of Lexius Moonflower is so much fun!

hmm, need to work on layout for my comic. Something at least decent, compared to what I have now. Yes, I used to have something of a layout on there, but somehow it got lost, so it's back to default. Which makes no sense... **sighs** anyways, I'm playing around with an HTML program. It's nice. Really simple like, cause I don't have photoshop to play with pictures to plug in, but I'll think of something. Like scanning in some sunsets with really bright colours that I've took. playing with flash settings is fun! ^^ but desposibles stink.

anyways, essay to get done. Then maybe I can sleep. or not, cause I got class, but then when all my classes are done, I can sleep. And hand in the essay. And just have to worry about the meeting with the dean I have on Friday. She wants to have tea over a discussion about my winter residence. nervous about that. me dunno whether I want to move out of my single or not. I've gotten used to my privacy in here.

g2g luv you all!

lol, I think that I might get to sleep before 12 tonight. Mind you, that's if I get this post up fast enough. heh heh

But I'm plenty tired; yesterday I went to a Babylon 5 marathon. We watched all of season two. So I didn't get home until two pm today. Yes, I slept on a couch in the 24 hour lounge. yes, I was a little hyper. No, nothing happened. oy, sleeping on a couch is uncomfortable! well, with those couches.

My parents are coming tomorrow. I was supposed to have a cue list handed into special needs yesterday, but I didn't get to it. Thursday the guys across the hall invited me to watch Ghost in the Shell, Run Lola Run, and Cowboy Bebop: the Movie I forget the official title of the Cowboy Bebop movie is, I knew it once. Yes, I did!
Anyways, so I watched those three movies instead of doing my homework. I've been lazy lately. I sort of have dropped NaNoWriMo, because after two essays on sleep deprivation, I'm realizing what a really stupid idea I had going. My physical and mental health can't handle that much stress.

**sighs** but it was so cool, I got a jump start to my trilogy. I'm thinking of trying to write, maybe 5,000 words on it a month kind of goal setting. That way it gets written, but without the risk of going to the hospital. I already had to go to Health Services for a major two-hour nose bleed. Yeah, it took two hours to get the blood to stop flooding. And apparently my family has unusually thin blood. I can't remember is I've mentioned any of this. But the doctors sort of were worried that something was wrong with my blood, so they had me come in for blood tests. Isn't it funny? I'm already Anemic, and can't donate blood. But then, I have blood taken out, and there around the corner is a blood donor clinic set up.
Do ANYONE knows how it FEELS to want to HElP, but know that you CAN'T???? it has to be one of the worst feelings in the world.

My friends know me; I have to help people. It's part of who I am. Not to be able to help is heart-breaking. So I try to help in other ways, but to know that there's a simple way to help save lives and that I'll never be able to help in that way...

**sighs** anyways, I want to get to bed soon, so I'll move on. I went down afterwards to get my flu shot. It's something good to have. Actually, I've been feeling less under the weather now. As I was waiting, I was cracking jokes about needles and pin cushions. Some kids thought that I had donated blood, and asked about it. I quickly told them that I had my blood tested. I considered making up a story about a blood disease, but I didn't think that it was really the time or place to really be joking about that.

Meh, it's snowing outside. I love it when it snows. I always sleep better, it calms me. Something soothing about it. Maybe because for the longest time when I was a kid, I was afraid that robbers would break into the house when we were asleep, and to me, they never came in after twelve o'clock. So I would stay up (and get freaked by those little sounds that houses make) until twelve, till I was sure that it was safe to sleep. For some reason with snow, I don't have to. number one, it makes the world pretty, and quiet, and calm looking. number two, snow reflects light, even at night, and especially in the city (I'm such a small city-kid), and ESPECIALLY when it's snowing. You can see at night. In fact, I like winter nights better than summer days. ick, warm light... Number three, I wouldn't want to be out on a snowy night for too long, not when there's a nice warm bed, and so I assume that everyone else wouldn't either. number four, snow, unless melts, show tracks, and thus tell who's been around.
With snow, when I'm tucked in, I'm safe.

oh boy, I'm looking back, and I can so see where Asperger's sneaks itself in.

**yawns** let's see, what else is there to tell? I got a B on my English essay. I accidently overdosed on Ritalin a week or two back, causing a little panic attack, but I got better when the drugs wore off. I went Christmas shopping. I picked up some books, and am keeping my eye out for more. hmm, Cinnamon should be coming soon. I can't wait! I found out that there's meal tickets at the main office for guests, so she can eat like I do!
hm, my parents are coming. They're bringing some stuff to help hang up wet coats. And another teddy bear!! My BIG one that I can hug if I have another panic attack. hugging is important ^^

what else, what else? hmmm, I can't think of anything. OKay, goodnight then!